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My boyfriend's a Meth head - Help!


16yrold
concerned
friend
My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
Hi, my name's Crystal and I really need someone to talk to. I'm 16 and my boyfriend's a Meth head. I personally have never done drugs although have been offered many times. My last boyfriend was a drug dealer and pothead. And in my last relationship (which isn't entirely over) drugs made everything go bad. I really want to help my boyfriend overcome his addiction but I don't want to ruin it this time. Please someone reply. I desperately need someone to talk to because of course I can't talk to my parents. Thanks
     replies....
imgetinrite Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
I'm sorry to say, but unless he wants help, you can only be there for him when he does. Does he want help? does he want to stop?
16yrold
concerned
friend
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
I mentioned something to him about him quitting before we went out and he said he wanted to but nothings changed. I figured it wouldn't though we've been friends now for 3 yrs. and I know he's a very headstrong person. I know he wants to quit but I don't know how to help him. And its really hard to stay strong for him sometimes cuz when he's coming down he is sssoooooo... mean. and I can't take it. I love him with all my heart cuz we've been friends for a while and afraid of losing.
silly
veronica
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!

Quote:


I know he wants to quit but I don't know how to help him.

You can't help him ... it's something he needs to do on his own and only then will he be able to quit. You can be supportive of him when he needs you (and boy, that is hard, especially like you already said, when the comedowns are so rough).

But when it comes to actually quitting - he will only quit when he's ready to and there is nothing you can say or do that will change that (trust me, I've lived it and I KNOW). That's very hard for loved ones to come to terms with, but it's the absolute truth.

I feel so bad for you - 16 years old and already having to deal with this. This drug can consume your life, can take over everything and you will focus on "fixing" him and nothing else. YOU are the only one who controls whether or not that happens - from someone who made the wrong choice, please take care of yourself first and foremost.

This drug creates greed and manipulation and lies - as long as he uses, it will come before you. It's a harsh reality and one that I struggled to accept - but it's the absolute truth. Be ready for anything - always on your toes. I wouldn't wish this drug on anyone - it creates a life of pure hell, if you let it.

forget
suzette
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
You could tie him to a chair ...
....that's about it.

not rehab, nor love, can save him.
....he's got to save himself.

kind of like, you're born alone, and you die alone.
....you decide to stop alone.

this will ruin your life..
...you can still be saved.

if you stay with him, you'll watch him change into something else, cover his ass when he doesn't, possibly end up using...you'll gather some ugly, bizarre, belittling memories...
...PLEASE save yourself.

don't do it.
...I'm sending this postcard from hell.
I did it.

it sucks here.
16yrold
concerned
friend
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
Thank you for the advice. That's another issue I'm concerned about. Although I've never tried meth I can't say I haven't thought about it. there are so many things going on in my life right now its not even funny. to make a long story short my parents are recovering alcoholics (you know the real rough ones) my moms going on 3 yrs and my dad well he's not doing so good and I've tried and tried to accept the fact that I cant change him and it's not my fault but it's hard when he's drunk and blames everything on me he also stays out all night at times (something I wish he would do more often) and my mother constantly defends him. Also I'm having problems with one of my ex.s who stopped doing pot but now that we're not together is doing it again and blaming it on me. He called me a second ago to remind me of this. It seems like all the men in my life are projects of my father and my ex  boyfriend. everybody!!! and it just seems so simple to give up and join the crowd. Ease the pressure and most importantly the pain. That's the scary part. I know I'll be around it tonight cuz its Friday. I just pray I don't mess up
silly
veronica
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
You HAVE to see a pattern of behavior here, right?! GET OUT NOW WHILE YOU CAN. I know that's easier said than done - but look around you and the influences that you have surrounding you.

The fact that you would even say that you've thought about it, or that you're worried because you'll be around it....

I ask you to do this. Stay on this board and read each and every post on the first page (all of them). Look at how meth has affected the user himself/herself, the wives/husbands, the children, the girlfriends/boyfriends, siblings, neighbors and other loved ones. If you can read through all of that - and SEE and FEEL the pain that meth has caused - I PRAY that you won't make the wrong choice.

Think of the pain you have already experienced from your BF's use ... how could you even contemplate using yourself? Meth kills and meth destroys - anything and everything in its path.

READ ... READ ... READ - I hope it scares the shi* out of you. Again, I wouldn't wish this hell on anyone.
Paws
from hell
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
Crystal Run fast,,,, meth is a liar... you state you don't want to lose your boyfriend , little sister if he's using, meth is his mistress , and she'll become his master. A meth head for a husband, think, the sex?, think, meth addicts have morals and selectivity of an alley cat, You can get Hep C from sharing a straw, pipe, or needle. And when , not if , he has sex with another person you risk yourself. Love yourself, and find the guy who loves himself enough to love and care about you.... RUN..
sierra
nights
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
My 24 year old son is a meth addict. I've watched him go thru a ton of girls. The relationships would start out good. Don't take long until they become relationships from hell. I've watched my son treat these girls like crap. I wouldn't talk to my dog like he does these girls. I told his last g/f, I wouldn't put up with him for one second.

Listen to the advice here. RUN! SAVE YOURSELF WHILE YOU STILL CAN.

fightn
back

Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
You've been through a lot in your life already. And you're carrying a load that's way too heavy for you. You said, "It seems like all the men in my life are projects my father my ex my boyfriend. everybody!!!" People spend a lot of money to have a therapist tell them what you've already figured out. You don't think you can fix your Dad's problems, so you "pick" boyfriends like your Dad, who need you, who you can rescue and straighten out. In the meantime, what about you? Who takes care of you? Take all that energy, all the resources you have and take care of yourself.
Loraura Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
Quote:
i know ill be around it tonight cuz its friday
ONLY if you chose to be where it is!

Seriously -- NOW IS THE TIME TO change YOU. Stop hanging around drug using boyfriends/friends.

You won't believe me till later, but trust me when I say having no friends is better than having friends who will lead you down the path of self-destruction.

Leave your boyfriend.

Leave your drug using friends.

Stop answering the phone from these people.

You can choose the life they have, or choose something better for yourself.

What do YOU want?
JUST
CATS
Re: My boyfriend's a Meth head - HELP!
Hello! I am glad that you came to this site, for help and support. I also had a bf, that I lived with that was a meth addict. It turns out, that I know about 7 people who have "ruined" their lives due to meth.

You see the pattern, and you do not like what you see, let that be something that you keep in the back of your mind, to keep you from ever trying meth. You can be hooked on meth, the VERY FIRST TIME YOU TRY IT! YOU CAN DIE, THE FIRST TIME, YOU TRY METH.

Addiction gets A LOT worse, than what you are seeing at this time. A meth addict will do "anything" to get, meth. Every time they use, they damage their brain, heart, lungs... My bf had seizures, which is "brain damage", and also thought he was having a heart attack...

Educate yourself on meth addiction. Google meth addiction. Google "the faces of meth," and check out the pics. Read the stories here, or anywhere. Please don't ever try meth, it may take a hold of you, the very, first time you try it.

There are a lot of us here, that have addicts that we love. I was engaged to my bf, but his meth addiction, was stronger than the both of us. He lost me, his job, our apartment, and his freedom- he violated his felony probation and will be sitting in a Florida prison for the next six years.

Meth, truly is "the Devil's drug" as it is called. You can talk to your bf about his meth addict, but you cannot make him stop. HE NEEDS TO WANT TO STOP.

I have a lot of info on meth, saved or there is a lot on the internet. Please read, whatever you can, so you can understand this addiction. And PLEASE NEVER LET ANYONE TALK YOU INTO TRYING IT, EVEN ONCE!!!

Do not blame yourself for an addicts addiction, whether it be meth addiction or alcohol. It is easier for an addict, that is miserable to blame his problems on anybody, but himself.

You need to want more for yourself, then to be surrounded by addicts. Get away from people that are using. It is a dead end street. It will cost you, your sanity over time, and get you absolutely nowhere in your life. You, are young and have a life ahead of you. Make it a good one! 

See also:

Husband / Boyfriend Use of Meth

My Boyfriend and Meth - Please explain!


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