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Do you turn the addict in?


dawnwith
thewind
A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
For those following my story, I didn't really post about this. Not sure why, but now it is knocking around in my brain.

When I met my addict, he was on probation. Probation ends in 12 days. (the day he left it would have ended in 17 days).

While packing his stuff I found his probation papers. He has clearly violated all the rules.

1. Restitution payment not paid this month
2. Did not obey "all laws"
3. Did not keep PO advised of whereabouts at all times
4. Owns a dangerous weapon
5. Changed residence (By leaving here) without notifying PO
6. Stopped working (He was required to work full time)

I could call his PO and he could be in serious trouble. I would do that if I thought it was what was best for him.
Just another confusing wonderment - why would he pull this just weeks before his probation was over?
     Replies...
Naiev
Newlywed
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
I called my husband's parole office, begging her to put him into treatment.
She gave him house arrest.
I ended up calling the police to come and remove him from my home. It was that or death.
He's been incarcerated almost 11 months now.
JUSTCATS Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
I tried talking to my ex's felony probation officer. Basically, the PO was covering for him, until I called a meeting... My ex was very good at lying and covering his tracks. He was also very charming and had the PO convinced that he is a good guy...
It all came down on my ex, many months later. His lies caught up with him and he is now in prison, due to meth and felony probation violations, up the butt.
I truly believe that Greg would be dead if he wasn't in prison. I hope he gets his head on straight, while doing time... At least I know that he is no longer having meth induced seizures and heart problems.

I don't know if I did the right thing, by talking to his PO or not.
dawnwith
thewind
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
I think if I were married to him I would definitely be calling the police to say he is missing.
But he is a big boy. Almost 45 years old. He is (but does not act like it) a grown up.
This big part of me wants to call because I think they could force him to straighten out...
But another part of me says No, don't call. He was in jail before and forced to straighten out, started using weeks after he got out. He was let out 10/31/03. I didn't know him in 2004 but he said he still used. Said he didn't stop until January 05.
Jail didn't work. He has to want to be clean and healthy.

If I felt I was in danger (if he reappeared and acted funky) I would definitely call the police... but is there any reason to turn him in now?

Arrrrgh I am so sick of angst.
katelin24 Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
Dawn- Maybe you should consider just being ready to tell the truth to the PO if they come looking for him. Whether you call them or not, DON'T cover for him.
Just my advice.
dawnwith
thewind
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
I'm a painfully honest person.
That is another thing that is driving me crazy..
I am so honest!
Especially in a relationship!!
Yet he lied to me.
My husband lied to me.
Gay boyfriend #1 lied to me.
I have been lied to by men for, oh, since 1992.

 

flowerchild
80744
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
maybe I missed this but what was he on probation for in the first place?
dawnwith
thewind
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
maybe I missed this but what was he on probation for in the first place

He was in for using meth/possession. He did 6 months and then had 2 yrs 8 months probation.
I'm not calling. His life. His thing. Him going to get his money at his mom's proves to me that he is so gone right now... nothing can save him but himself.
It took him a year to save that money, and it was intended for specific things
all gone to drugs now. 5 thousand frickin dollars.
MethPhobia Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
Hey I typed you a response on your other post but it got lost argh  so I'll post here instead.

Well as loved ones of addicts you'll realize that most of us walk down very similar paths...with a slight difference here and there.

I've been in your position and honestly there is nothing you can do now to change, control or stop what is going on. What you are in control of is yourself.

It seems to me that you're realizing this and are beginning to understand that letting go and letting God will be best thing for you to do.

But don't lose hope...recovery is possible. My hubby came back out of the blue one day and decided to quit of his own accord...after being out of the house on a run for more than a month.

Just take good care of yourself now...pick yourself up and start leading a life again. You need to know how to lead a good life with or without him...

Don't close the door and don't burn the bridge...in the meantime just pray really hard...and come back here often...
dawnwith
thewind
Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
Thank you K. I am glad to read your post.

Yep. Day 6. I'm getting there. Been on the phone a lot with friends and family, one is a recovering meth addict and it was really good to talk to him. Plus he is gay so that helped even more so.

I also completed a lot of chores. Didn't cry while doing them. Just focused and did what needed to be done.
My pity party stopped after the phone call with his mother.
Cabird Re: A question about the law - do you turn the addict in?
I tried to turn my addict in one time. I called probation and they wouldn't talk to me without his written permission. They said it would violate his privacy. I am not sure it is possible for a citizen to turn them in for violating. It may depend on where you live. I'm in CA.

See also:

Legal, Law Enforcement, Jail & Prison issues with Meth

I turned in my meth addict daughter


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