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Meth cravings and dreams of using


Savannah
05
Meth cravings / using dreams

Ok I have probably asked about the cravings and using dreams a zillion times before so maybe a more specific question would help. I have been clean for 228 days now and the cravings and using dreams are not getting better but getting worse. I thought all things get better with time!! In the beginning of getting clean I didn't really crave it at all, just sort of felt like it was part of a daily routine I was changing. Now I they the cravings come out of no where and hit me hard. Like I feel it in my core. With the dreams in the beginning I would get very close to getting high but wake up before I even hit the pipe/did a line. Now I am playing out the whole scene in my dreams, down to all the little dramas that come with it. So my question is for all the people with significant clean time, how long did it last for you???

    Replies...
Penelope Re: Meth cravings / using dreams 

Hi Savanny!!!

I still have using dreams. The thing about it is that I am not having any fun in my dreams - the theme is always about regret and despair. I'm always hiding from people while I'm getting high, and I am never enjoying myself.

As far as the cravings are concerned, keep it up and that will go away too. Give it time, my little friend!

Sfj Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

Recovery is not a straight line, but a long and winding road, with ups and downs, back and forth, but always forward. The days and months and years add up at a totally predictable rate.

Congratulations on your success. It really is something you will look back on with well-deserved pride.

nine
years
clean
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

Hello Savannah, and congrats on 228 days. That's a remarkable accomplishment.

Over 9 years clean and I still have the nightmares. They are always brutal and painful, just as my using days were. My ex-husband is always in them, treating me like dirt, and my son is always there, at about 4 years old, needing me, but not getting my attention.

I hate them. The cravings, for me, didn't last long. Only about the first 6 months actually. Haven't had any since. Hope I never do!!

Good luck to you, and again, yeah on 228 days!!

lax2 Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

Good Work Savannah!!! So glad to hear you're hangin in there.

As for cravings, I find they got a lot less intense the longer I stayed clean, Particularly after the milestones of 1 year and again after 2 years. I rarely have craved since 2 years clean... I find its best to not dwell on the thought of using at all. Get my mind on something else when they hit.

As for using dreams I still get those. However, like Penelope They rarely remind me of anything I'd want to relive. I'm always relieved to wake up and realize it was just a dream. Like you, usually I wake up be4 I have actually done a line. In my dreams I'm holding some and looking for a place to ... Then I'm gathering things to pack my bags and car in order to get somewhere I can use confortably. I of course never get there, which I take to mean as a symbol as there is no comfortable place to use.

It's simply not an option. In order to live I must not use anything.

Hope to see you more often. I Am so glad you are staying clean. Keep doing whatever makes you feel comfortable. As long as you dont use. Love you Savy. I'm very proud of you.

Savannah
05
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

Ya I am just being impatient, but hey I am only 20!! lol I know that the the length of time it takes for cravings and dreams to subide is different for everyone and that I may well have them for the rest of my life. And I know that even if I continue to have them for the rest of my life that they will become less frequent and not so intense , but I just want it to *poof* be gone!

Pen,
You said something about how in you dreams getting high isn't fun anymore. When was getting high ACTUALLY ever fun?

Getting so high that while putting a pound of concealer on I am pouring it all over my dresser (putting on make to hide inside the house?), then loosing about an hour of time wondering what I did from 10-11, playing majong on the computer until the sun rises, looking in the mirror in the morning after 6 hours of game play and seeing your eyes are blood red, spending most the next day hunting for a sack so you do not have to go through the dreded comming down process, then when you can not find anymore you lay in bed all day tossing and turning. praying for sleep to come, and trippin out on evey little noise you hear!!!!

"ARE WE HAVING FUN YET!!"

Sure am glad thats all in my past!!

Naiev
Newlywed
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

I have a question about this.

Is it possible for some people who are trying to get clean and have little clean time to start using again just because the dreams are too scary?

I sometimes used to think hubby was scared to sleep for some reason. Even when he did, he would have nightmares. I don't know if they were about using or what.

Jady333 Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

I know how you feel. I have been sober since June 14, 2004 and I still have the dreams and the cravings, and just recently that have gotten really bad. I know this doesn't give you much hope, but they will subside and then start again. You just have to hold on and take a deep breath. You may also want to look around you and see if anything was triggering these feeling. I was reading a book an addict and I think that book triggered a lot of feelings and wants because it was talking about getting high and the smell and taste of the drugs and I wanted it so badly. So I put myself right there with you. Just Hold On!!! and Be Strong!!!

danimal
55
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

Congratulations Savannah! you're getting to be an "old timer" yourself I've had one using dream in the last year and it sucked, I had "confiscated" a big pile of meth and ended up at home with it trying to figure out a way to do some when the dealer I "confiscated" it from showed up with the cops to reclaim it, I think I was being busted about the time I woke up so much for Euphoric Recall.
I live and breath meth recovery on a daily basis, and I think the cravings and using dreams are squelched by doing so. If we cultivate or nuture ANY thought of using, we give that thought strength and power until it finally manifests itself as a relapse. Euphoric Recall is nothing to play around with, it is the first of a series of those cunning, baffling, and powerful unseen forces that we must consciously challenge.... or fall pray to them. Telling ourselves "I want to use" makes about as much sense as cordless bungie jumping. We KNOW what will happen.

Flyf1sh
3r
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

228 days! NICE!!!

Using dreams are reminders of where we came from, and how fortunate we are not to have to live like that anymore.

Talking about triggers take their power away. Good work Savannah.

colie
5150
Re: Meth cravings / using dreams

So I too have almost 2 years clean ( 9 more days )YAHOOO!!!
I am reciently going through somehard times> I may have Breast Cancer. My using dreams have also hit full force too. I am really thankful for them today. I can look at them as a reminder of where I cane from and where I'm not going back to. The triggers, I find that when I talk about them it takes the power out of them and they go away! Till next time. Just keep talking about it all.
CONGRATS ON 288 DAYS GOOD JOB AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!!!!


See also:

Behavior / Sleeping Problems / Mental Issues

Bad Dreams from Meth


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